Open Up

"You have to open up to people"
"Been there, done that"

I want to do that so bad.
I want to open up to people.

I want to tell someone that i'm hurt. I want to show them my scars. I want them to know that i am bleeding. I want to have another shoulder to cry on. I want to someone to calm me down when i was at my breaking point.

But, I'm afraid to do that.

Because I'm afraid that I'll get attached. I'm afraid that I'll clingy to them. I'm afraid that I'll feel like i need them. I'll afraid that i I'll feel like i want them. That shouldn't be.

Because I'm afraid if someday they gonna leave me. I'm afraid if someday they gonna get tired of me. I'm afraid if someday they will get annoyed of me.

It's not like i don't want to open up to people. I do and i did. It just that when i told them everything, I let them know everything. They just done with it.

I want to do it. But, I'm afraid to lose something that gonna make me strong again.

I'm afraid to lose again.

So, it's better to not build hope on people instead of giving it to them and it ends with a heartbreak.

-LS